Well, what can I say except that being a minister's wife is ummm, like being in purgatory, can someone pray me out of it? Ooops, I meant it is a challenge. There are days that you want to laugh, cry, scream, run away or pull a curse word from your pocket. Today, I literally bit my tongue in half so I didn't say something I'd regret or get us canned!
I guess I should clarify my tone here, I'm being funny. Those of you, who know me, know I do standup on the side. If I couldn't laugh or joke about the craziness in my life, I would go nuts. I love being a minister's wife because I love my husband, I love serving alongside of him and I believe in God's message. Is ministry a challenge? You bet it is. It's an obstacle course with more hurdles than a road in Mississippi has potholes. Is it worth it? You bet it is. Showing people God's love and discipling them is worth every effort. Could anything be better than trying to bring God's kingdom on earth to His people? I don't think so.
Is being a minister's wife easy, you ask. Well, sometimes yes and sometimes no. After 11 years of being in the ministry, I have grown accustomed to most things ministry has to offer or throw my way. The initial shock of a lot of things has worn off. I was overwhelmed our first 5 years with what search committees actually asked me in a pastor's interview.No, I don't play the piano. No, I don't play the organ. No, I don't sing solos. No, I don't babysit pets. No, I don't do interpretive dance movements. I was a disappointment to some of those who interviewed us. Over the years, I have become more comfortable with who I am as a minister's wife. I love people. I love children. I serve where God has gifted and equipped me. I make no apologies for what I can't be. I am what God has made me. I support my husband and encourage him to the best of my ability. I used to be afraid of what people thought about me. Now, don’t get me wrong, I care about how I present myself, everyone should, but I don't worry if someone thinks bad of me for not singing a solo. They really would think badly about me if I did. I pick my worries like some people pick battles.
One of the biggest challenges of ministry is time. A pastor is always on call and always needed. It is hard to draw boundaries especially when you are married to someone who can't say no. I handle this best by knowing that sharing Tim with others is kingdom work. This is an issue I will not talk about in length, unless you are a minister's wife. It's a sensitive topic to be honest. I support Tim and the decisions he makes. God has called him to this ministry and I will always support and encourage him. I will also make sure my children understand what daddy does and why it's so important. They will support him too.
Ministry can also being isolating. Most church members, not all, are hesitant to be around the pastor and his family. Maybe they are afraid of what we will think of them or maybe they think we keep a list of who's naughty or nice, but truth be known, we know you're human, like us, and we enjoy your friendship. We don't keep lists, as long as you don't. Having said all that, there are those who are fearless and interact with us. Those people can testify that we don't bite or keep lists . We aren't perfect, almost, but not quite.(Can't you hear my laughter?) Tim and I are humans like the rest of you. So please don't put us on a pedestal. I hate falling with everyone watching. It is so embarrassing. We strive to be the best God has called us to be and we strive to put into practice what we believe about Jesus Christ and His teachings. We love and minister to all people regardless of anything the world labels them as.
Why am I writing all this? I don't know. I think about the ministry a lot and I think about the couples and families that serve. I hold very dear in my heart God's ministry and bringing His kingdom to earth. I believe in putting it into action. I know it can be a challenge. But I also know it can be done. I hope my note hasn't offended anyone, especially our church members. I love our church family and I am very grateful for the opportunity to serve you and alongside with you. I will always do my best in my role as the minister's wife. I will serve where I am needed and I will encourage, love and support your pastor, my husband, Tim. May God work in your lives as we bring His kingdom to earth.
P.S. I don't keep curse words in my pocket. :)
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